Bombalurina's story
by Shadows.in.the.moon
Summary: Is a Multi chap now :D about her begining and the pain that drove her to suicide, her life now has 2 paths, 1-the heaviside lair to her dead sister, 2-the Junkyard where it just gets worse. it all depends on whether Misto can heal her in time.
1. Chapter 1

**first one shot ever, dont hate me! **

**i dont own cats only the idea for this story, i had a nightmare last night about the same kind thing happening to my sister, i thought i might as well do something with the raw emotion so i did, and here it is, i hope you like it and well...enjoy**

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I forever hate the day I first thought Macavity was just Misunderstood. I forever curse the day I told my little sister to be a little lenient, to be forgiving, to try and understand him. I hate myself in such a way that no one apart from Demeter has been aloud to see the true me.

Demeter, Lutie and myself had been under Macavitys care since we were kittens, we rarely saw him though, we were usually looked after by the tribe Nurse. The fact that Macavity had taken us in of his own accord softened me to his brutal ways. Made me feel sorry for him that no one ever got close to him freely, that people spread horrid rumour about him, that i later found were true. That's why, despite Demeter's orders, I tried to talk to him when I could, tried to get Lutie to talk to him. She listened to me of course, she trusted me, liked me more than Deme. She shouldn't have, that trust, that love, brought her to her death, I brought her to her death.

_Flash Back_

"Lutie get yourself cleaned up, time to get up!" I called through her den entrance to her.

"Sure, whatever!" she called back, I soon heard her roll over and hit the floor.

"Ow" she grumbled from inside her den. I grinned to myself and rolled my eyes whilst I waited for her. Maybe Five minutes later Macavity came slinking out of the shadows and a second after Lutie jumped out of her den.

"good, Lutie, just who I wanted to see" Macavity smiled, the scars disfiguring his used-to-be-handsome features. Lutie gulped a little, I smiled at her encouragingly and she smiled up at the tribe leader.

"its nice to see you to sir, how may I help you?" she smiled and curtsied a little.

"I need to have a chat with you, in private…would you?" he said motioning to Lutie to enter her den again. She nodded and made to turn back to her den. I smiled at her and despite the little worry in her eyes, she smiled back.

"see you in a minute sis'" she smiled and continued into the den Macavity quickly followed her through and closed off the entrance.

I stood by the entrance listening in in a way that looked as if I was just sitting there, not drawing attention to myself. It was maybe a minute into the conversation was Lutie's voice raised in a panic, I couldn't make out what Macavity had said to her, he always mumbled and the thick wood that made as Lutie's den didn't help. My ears pricked as I listen harder.

"you will do as I say, I am the leader of the tribe, you will do my bidding" Macavitys voice raised in anger.

"I wont do it, I just wont!" Lutie's shout came panted, as if she were struggling, I heard a loud crash. It sounded like Lutie's glass vase had just shattered, her shouting became more panicked, I could hear her backing away.

"go away, leave me alone!" she shouted, I heard her hit the wall closest to me. I turned and made to push the heavy wood entrance out of the way but a centimetre away from the wood a kind of force-field glittered and shimmered in front of me. It stung painfully as I pressed against it with all my might. A second latter, over more shouts and cries for help the wood moved away. Lutie was crying as she pushed it away and tried to run out.

"Help me B, please help!" Lutie cried as she pressed against it, Macavity walking with a shard of sharp glass in his paw.

"Lutie, Everlasting cat, Lute, I'm so sorry!" I shouted as I banged against the shield. Lutie just cried more seeing that me, her favourite sister, the Queen who could do anything, couldn't help her.

"Macavity please, she' only a kitten, let her go!" I cried as I hit on the shield, my paws only bouncing away again. Macavity laughing and the sound made my fur stand on end, and Lutie's eyes just went dead, she knew she wouldn't get out now.

"why would I? she refuses to do as I say, she will get punished for it" Macavity laughed again. I looked to Lutie. She just stood stock still as Macavity arm found its way around her neck. She stared at me with betrayal and hatred and her eyes simply said, 'you did this to me'. I cried as the glass was pressed to her throat, her eyes simply stared onwards. As the glass slipped into the first layers of flesh she finally screamed, the pain was there as she struggled to get away from the pain, Macavitys grip didn't loosen as she smirked at me, I cried and begged and soon he shook his head and looked back to Lutie.

"see the light leave her eyes, go on, it's the best part" Macavity smirked and just as I looked to Lutie's eyes, all hope lost, the scream gurgled to a stop. Her beautiful blue eyes slowly dimmed, it was painful to see as the blood poured from both her mouth and the gash in her throat. I cried and soon fell forward as Macavity sauntered out, licking my sisters blood off his paws. I crawled forward to my little sister and sat her head in my lap, gagging as her body fell limply and her head rolled.

I looked at her crystal blue eyes one last time before closing them.

"I'm so sorry, I'll never forgive myself Lutie, never" I cried as I pulled her to me and rocked her back and forth slowly.

"never" I whispered as I cried into her head fur. I barely noticed when Demeter wrapped her arms around me and promised we would get out that night. Barely noticed when the strange silver tabby tom and several others slinked into or den that night. I hadn't let go of my sister for two days after that, and I hadn't eaten for weeks after that. I couldn't stand her death being my fault. It was only Demeter who persuaded me that I couldn't have know. That it wasn't my fault. It was then that I finally left the den that we had been given in the Junkyard for the first time.

_Flash back end_

But I know that it was my fault, she listened to me, trusted me to protect her if anything went wrong, trusted my word that Macavity wasn't bad. And no one knows that I've known this since I first laid eyes on my sisters dead body. I only left mine and Demeter's den in the Junkyard to please Demeter. When I had time to my own no body knew what I did to myself. I kept the glass that Macavity had used and I brought it with me to the Junkyard. It was my own personal weapon, I used it often, and my blood often mingled with my sisters late at night, when no one could hear the pained whimpers leave my lips, when Demeter was asleep and no one could stop me, and when no one was in the den to disturbe me, even though it was were the middle of the day.

I picked up the glass again and thought to myself. _'when will the day come when I cut myself a little too deeply, when will the day come that I don't wake up the morning because of what i did the night before?' _I turned the glass over and held it to my upper arm, over a deep scar that had forever been the place I used, my back turned to my den entrance. I took a deep breath and prepared to put pleasure on the sharp blade.

"hey Bomba, they have some fresh mice, you want any?" Demeter's voice came from the entrance. I jumped, surprised.

" sure, I'll be there in a second" I told her glancing back to her slightly. She smiled at me.

"what's going on here then?" Misto and Tuggers voices came from the entrance, the newly mated couple smiled at me as I glanced back.

"Just asking Bomba if she wants some mice, some have been freshly caught" Demeter smiled at the couple, Tuggers ears pricked up instantly.

"great I'm starving, come on then" Tugger said motioning to all of us.

"you coming Bomb?" Deme asked. I nodded.

"I'll be there in a second" I smiled she nodded and followed after Misto and Tugger. I breathed a sigh of relief and walked to my pile of cushions and placed the glass under them. I sighed wistfully as I pushed out of my entrance, a fake, cheerful smile plastered on my face. I watched the junkyard knowing I would never find what I needed here, never the repose that I have been missing for so many years. My mind wandered back to the glass under my cushions.

"maybe its time" I whispered to myself as I so often did nowadays. I slinked away from the happy crowd and to my den, I smiled as I felt the cool glass in my paws. I smiled as I felt the glass that killed my sister so many years ago press into my skin and slice through layers of flesh. I felt my life blood pour down my fur, just as I sunk to the floor the entrance opened.

"hey, Demeter sent me to fetch you and...Oh Everlasting Cat! Help! somebody get help!" Tugger, my best friends cry rang in my ears. I looked up at him blearily as Misto blocked my view and looked me over.

"Bombalurina, Demeter is so going to flip" I heard a voice whisper, I choked on my blood as I heard it. Lutie.

"yep me, well, it all depend on whether Misto can fix you, but I'm sorry, I don't blame you, it wasnt your fault, even Everlasting cat agrees, I asked him when I got here" her voice rang in my ears, blocking out whatever noise was being made in the Junkyard.

"but if you do make it, don't do this again, if not well, It'll be nice to see you again, Mum and Dad say the same" Lutie's voice said, it sounded like she was smiling.

"well, I'll leave you to your own devises, I might see ya soon, I hope not though, your future looked so bright if it were to continue, anyways, wishing you the best sis, love you" her voice broke at the end, I opened my eyes and saw, along with the panicked Jnkyard Lutie's misty figure.

"I love you Lutie" I smiled painfully as I held my paw out to her, when her paw was only a centimetre away the world went black.

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**right so there it is, it'd be great if you could like, Review and stuff, **

**SO...if you would like this continued plz tell me, i dont know whether it should be left or not so its up to you to deside :D anyways, until another time **

**xox**

**Emily**


	2. I'm Sorry

This chapter is for **Lunaralda** my first Reviewer and **Malurina** the first person to have this on Story alert

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I didn't want to open my eyes to whatever realm I was in, I wanted to stay in the black and never return to whatever scolding I would wake to, whether it be mother and fathers or Demeter's Munk's and Tugger's. Either would be painful enough. I knew now, after what Lute had said it was stupid of me to do something like that, Demeter wouldn't of had blood family left, my friends would morn, and I wouldn't be able to live out my sister's life for her, how she would have wanted me to. But now, I didn't want to wake, being lost to blackness was a relief compared to the real world.

"Stop wallowing in self pity and open your eyes!" hissed a voice I barely recognised because it held so much venom. With that voice my eye flung open and took in the world around me. It was bright and vibrant, blurred at the edges only one figure completely solid. His paws pressed against my skull as I felt his magic beat against my skull and run through my veins. Misto sat on my chest as he forced magic into me, it was literally pouring from him, his eyes were glowing with a heavenly light, as he continued to force my body to repair itself and forced my brain to work properly. He closed his eyes as he pulled his paws from where they had been pressing to before collapsing to the side breathing deeply.

I was pulled into My sisters lap as I watched Tugger kneel beside his mate crying, he quickly looked to someone in the corner of the den, I followed his gaze and saw Coricopat and Tantomile. They simply nodded and he instantly relaxed as he placed a kiss on his mates forehead and moved him into a more comfortable position. I was well aware of my sister crying as she caressed my fur let her tears mingle with my bloodied fur. How half the junkyard were packed into my small den and how people shouted, asking what was happening but I watched Misto, and thought about how he just saved my life. This perplexed me no end. The tom was so small, so young yet he had saved a life, and my life for bast sake, why would he save me? I had never done anything for him, he had never been a close friend of mine, a friend of a friend I was just getting to know- my trail of thought was cut shot as I felt something move from my paws. I glanced down to see Munk removing my glass from my paw. I tightened my paw around it. Munk looked up a sad frown on his face.

"Bomba let go" he ordered firmly. I shook my head, Munk grabbed my wrist and prised my claws from it. Tears welled in my eyes.

"Please…Munkstrap, it's all I have left of Lutie" I rasped slowly, lightly, he didn't even hear. I forced myself to sit up lightly pushing my sister away. Munk was already out the den. No one knew what to do with me, Jenny looked angry but was nervous about pushing me in the wrong place, hurting me even more. I left the den and tried to catch up with Munk, barely noticing the shocked gazes of the tribe.

"Munkustrap, Please…Munkustrap!" I called after him, my throat hurting as I raised my voice. He turned to look at me with a shake of his head before running full speed out of the Junkyard and throwing it against a brick building. I was grabbed that second, I watched as tears filled my eyes and the glass shattered and glinted dimly in the midday sun. I didn't fight, I buried my face in Tuggers long fur and cried.

"Come on Angel, you need to rest," he purred lightly as he carried me back to my den.

After twenty-four hours I woke, feeling exhausted. Over-night Demeter had the chance to get over the shock of nearly losing me and had built up her anger.

"Why the hell did you do that Bomba!" she shouted at me as I was restricted to my sleeping surface. I glared at my feet hating what I had put her through.

"Well? Are you going to answer me? Or do you really hate me that much!" she shouted sounding chocked by the end. I glared at my feet as tears came to my own eyes.

"I do my Best Bomba, I really try, but you never help, you never tell me a thing, hiding that from me and nearly…Killing yourself how do you think that makes me feel? I feel like I've failed, is that what you want?" she shouted, sobs could be heard when she paused. I glared as Tears fell down my cheeks. I clenched my paws before looking straight at her.

"I never said I hated you!" I shouted as loud as I could with my aching throat.

"I never said I wanted what I've been given, I didn't want Lute to die, I never wanted for my life to disintegrate a little more each time someone I loved died" I shouted as I ripped little holes in the blanket beneath me.

"I thought she died because of me Deme, I couldn't live with that…I need her to tell me that so I could finally get a piece of my mind back, a piece of my heart back, I wanted the pain to go!" I sobbed barely whispering, Deme cried as she wrapped her arms around me and dried my face. I leant into her chest as I wrapped my arms around her, like I used to before I grew so tall.

"Yesterday after you did that stupid thing you said : 'I love you Lutie,' why?" Deme asked in a whisper. I breathed in deeply, calming my self.

"She came to see me, she said it wasn't my fault and that Mum and Dad miss us," I murmured relaxing into the homey feel of my sisters fur.

"She would," Deme sighed with a small laugh that made her chest vibrate, tickling me slightly.

"I'm Sorry," I breathed feeling sleep creep up on me.

"Me too." she sighed laying me back down on the Sleeping surface and laying a old tea towel over me and I scrunched into a ball and fell sleep

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**Well i hope you liked. review, sub to the story, that kinda thing, you will all get mentions in my next chappy if you do :D (not that i'm bribing you...) ;D **


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